So I Think I Can Dance!

I think one of the reasons I love watching "So You Think You Can Dance" every year is because I wonder what my life would be like now if I had pursued dancing professionally.  Not in the way that I hate my life now or anything but in the way that you wonder about a different possibility.  You wonder where you would be living instead of where you are now and who your friends would be.  What your family would be like now.  If you really would have made it or if you would have struggled like so many do in the world of dance amongst so many other art forms.

Everyone makes the decisions that they do and for a good reason.  My reason for not following dance professionally was partly because I never really had the "dancer's body" but definitely it was because I knew it wouldn't pay the bills.  But would I have been happier?  Would I have felt more satisfied knowing that I had truly tried and followed what my heart really told me to?

It's something I think about quite often.  Even though I was only 125 pounds and 5'8" I never had the body of a ballet dancer which is what I truly fell in love with (ballet).  I started too late in life, according to the ballet purists.  I know I had/have talent but could it have been enough?  If it wouldn't have been enough why didn't I look into choreography?  I've always loved it and loved creating little shows and putting together dance routines for our annual concerts......but that was a long time ago.  (Photo above was taken at a performance at Palomar College - a ballet piece set to Bach - I'm on the left)

This is exactly why I adore and admire the dancers that are on the show.  They are truly doing what their heart is telling them they were meant to do and they are great at it!  They have SUCH passion!  When I watch them perform I sometimes DO wish that I could go back in time and see how I would have turned out if I had followed that dream.  I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be in Portland right now if I had, that's for sure, and I don't know if I would be willing to trade that for anything.

Dancing, choreography, dancers, music - it all speaks to me.  It moves me and I just love being a part of it and if the show keeps that fire alive in me, then great.  Last year I was lucky enough to have gotten tickets to their tour when they came here to Portland and scored some backstage passes - I met almost ALL of the top dancers and to meet them and talk to them even if for just a few minutes made me appreciate all that I have and all that I have learned over the last 10 years of living on my own.  I am thankful for all of the wonderful people that I have met throughout the years and know that I would never trade that for anything.

Still, it is fun to dream!